Online dating has become extremely popular over the last few years, and actually most of my friends met their partners on a dating site. Obviously I’ve been in a relationship for 11 years and online dating wasn’t really a thing when I was single, so it has been interesting researching the online dating platforms. I’m impressed at how inclusive it is especially in regards to single disabled people and also the option of dating for disabled seniors. My sister is disabled and hasn’t ventured into online dating but it is something which I think would be great for her, especially given how difficult it can be for her to meet people due to her circumstances. I think meeting someone online can be a confidence boost and also get the awkward conversations out of the way before meeting someone in person. I know that many people struggle to talk about their disability which is why this You Tube channel, discussing different disabilities and subjects around it is really interesting. I was drawn to the video ‘Great Tips For Living In An Interabled Relationship’ With Jenna Farmer. Jenna suffers from crohns disease and her husband doesn’t have any disabilities, so it is interesting hearing her account of the dynamic of their relationship.

Obviously when talking about a disability it doesn’t have to be a physical one, it could a mental one too like anxiety or depression both of which can make dating hard, so hopefully these ideas will help as a guide for putting yourself out there or for dating someone with anxiety.

• Challenge negative thoughts- If you find yourself thinking “I’m not good enough to date this person.” look at what evidence there is to support this vs why you are good enough.
• Be open and honest- This is much easier to do over text/email than face to face, especially if you’re feeling anxious.
• If social anxiety is a problem then research your date venue making sure the atmosphere or vibe suits you. Ask your date to meet you outside if you are nervous about walking in on your own.
• Use the safety of online dating to share the story of your disability and to break the ice.
• Choose an outfit which makes you feel amazing and a scent to match. I personally feel at my most confident best wearing any scent by Tom Ford. We all have that perfume or accessory which makes us feel great.

Some date night ideas especially during lockdown could involve doing an online cocktail making class over Zoom, something which is always popular and breaks the ice, quite literally. Another date idea could be a socially distanced evening picnic in a park, especially now that we are getting close to spring or visiting a botanical garden. Once out of lockdown other popular ideas could be a museum date, especially as most museums are wheelchair friendly or a cinema date followed by a meal.

This article by Disability Horizons shares some interesting tips on dating.

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